Additionally, bear in mind that any message you share, even with close relatives, will be amplified to your complete online community. (The tension may also be amplified around vaccines, health measures and the stress of a not-normal year.) If you are replying to your sister online about something, which doesn’t mean you can talk to her as harshly as you may independently. Ms. Gottsman advises taking a heated household discussion offline.
Dont start a family feud on social media, Ms. Gottsman said. “It can impact the next family holiday. ”
If you’re soliciting donations for a specific cause or charity, or asking for money to pay someone’s rent or healthcare bills with a GoFundMe campaign, recognize the financial situations of many people have changed last year and there may be many different appeals compared to times past. Skip shaming phrases, like “How can you not help this person? ” Instead, Ms. Gottsman said, use ones like “If your heart moves you, I’m sharing this. ”
Consider your audience.
Think less vigilance is necessary, because your text group is small or your settings have been changed to private? Think again. When Heidi Cruz, the wife of Senator Ted Cruz of Texas, shared her family ’s plans to flee a devastating winter storm in Texas for a vacation in Mexico, she texted only a small group of neighbors and friends. Screenshots of the messages ended up with journalists. Elaine Swann, an etiquette expert and founder of the School of Protocol in Carlsbad, Calif., points out that it wasn’t only one person who shared the conversation with The New York Times; there were others who confirmed it.
Even if you believe its only your inner circle, theres always somebody there who isnt 100 percent in your group, she said. “ That ’s the person who takes the screenshot until you delete whatever it is. ”
Ban body-size talk.
Posting about fitness and food may be more tempting than normal, given that a good deal of people have changed what they consume and how much they exercise throughout the pandemic. But limit your comment to how these lifestyle changes make you feel, not how they make you look. Among other things, not all people have experienced the luxury of more time to work out during the pandemic — or if they did, they may not have had the energy to do so.
Dr. Lindsay Kite is a founder of Beauty Redefined, a nonprofit that promotes body image resilience, and an author of “ More Than a Body. She noticed that your before pictures talking about how fat you look maybe someone elses after. ”